Life After Suboxone
Life after suboxone:
This has been a long overdue post. It's been over 2 1/2+ years for me that I have been off of suboxone.... Big deal right? The thing is that those 2 1/2+ years that I was on it, it totally changed my life. I got all my shit back in order, didn't have to stress about "I am down to 10 vicodins or X amount of oxycontins before I run out (which when I was that low, I was counting down minutes to Zero Hour)..better start making those calls now to get more and I hope someone comes thru".
The financial factor that was involved took a big toll. I was lucky when it came to the financial factor for most (not all) of the time I was on the pills. I had an inside line with the inventory manager of a pharmacy. Though I was charged (on the side...sometimes)...if I didn't pay up, my annoying phone calls and personality or pleading always got me my way. By the time my bill got really up there, it would be my birthday, or Christmas or what ever and I was always given a pass (yes it was a friend of mine who at the time felt that maybe he/she was to blame for getting me in that deep or adding to the problem).
Well that wasn't such a positive start to my post. Focusing in on the bottom line. If you're on suboxone, from my experience and 1000's of e-mails I have recieved (not being arrogant on the "1,000's of e-mails, just letting you know I read everyone and get my opinion that I voice here from them and my personal views), you are on it cause you want to be on it. It is natural to be afraid of the great unknown, of the life without "feeling normal"... The feeling normal is how WE, with this problem see it.
The biggest thing you have to keep in mind is take your time if you are on it. I was nervous about getting off it for all of the following reasons: (even though I knew 99.9% that I was ready to get off it, that .1% factor freaked me the FUCK out!).
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Am I really ready?
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Am I going to go thru 3-4 months of NO emotion, NO drive,...or just the feeling of "NOTHING" which will cause me to.....using more of a pharmaceutical term "re-evaluate my discontinuation syndrome".
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Will I be happy again?
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Am I going to withdrawal from all the activities that are now back in my life.
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Question: "Why f**k with something if it isn't broken? I'm great, I feel great, I'm (technically) healthy and functioning physically at 100%...my personality is great, all my friends and family like me again... IS IT WORTH IT, WORTH throwing away all of these positive influences and lifestyles that I have now re-gained"?
If you're reading this, you don't have to comment on alot, but do me a favor... Let me know what you have questioned or are questioning. (I don't put up any ads on this site, I don't make money off of this site cause this site is personal to me and to you... I'm swamped running my own deal... I have never asked for anything before, but let me know what's on your mind or what you have questioned both before and if after).
To cover right off the bat, what I am sure you are wondering:
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It took me a good 3-4 months to feel truly myself again.
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NO, I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE SHIT THE WHOLE TIME and I am NOT saying I went thru 3-4 months of withdrawals. Just takes time TO BE NORMAL AGAIN . Keep in mind, your brain has to heal, has to get rebalanced and so on.
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It did take me about 1 month to get over the withdrawals. (In my suboxone 101 post, I said I started seeing the light at day like 12 or so (plus tack on 3 days of feeling no withdrawals cause of the half life so really it was day 15)... Seeing the light and living in a constant state of shit was 2 completely seperate things and any improvement was a good one). Again, bottom line and really looking back on it with clearity, it was day 25 before I could think clearly without straining myself.
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After 3 months I would catch myself in a state of "wonder" as I realized I laughing at shit...simple jokes, old stories etc... I was working again (I have my own businesses, which took A HUGE hit during this down time), I was being creative again, I was wanting to "DO THINGS AGAIN, with passion and with drive".
The biggest thing I have noticed looking back on this time of just being free. I am, and I can say this with 100% certaintity and with the past 2 1/2+ years under my belt...just not interested in anything to do with opiates. I have hurt myself (since I ride / drive off-road and just do stupid shit at times) and tylenol is the just of my pain relief. I had a route cannal done...doctor offered me vicodin...(new dentist) "thanks but I am allergic to them". My girlfriend has had vicodin in the house; she has always backed me and been there for me 1000%, but has seemed to forget about my past, cause that is what it is to me, my past. I have not...sense I have gotten my life back on track looked at opiates or opiate medications any different than I look at a vitamin pack. I only write about it now cause I look back on it in retrospect. I still have probably (cause I have not counted them) 20 or 30 8mg suboxone in the house... I have found them on accident 3 times over the past few years (my girlfriend hid them on like d-day minus 7 and distributed them out to me so I would fuck up my last days before I jumped off them)... Why don't I just toss them? Cause again, I just don't think about it, or you know...maybe I do...and it just makes me stronger cause I know I just don't give a shit about them.
In the end... There is life after suboxone or really the opiate addiction. Suboxone is just a great tool to "pause" the situation at hand. The problem is...it is that easy to just hit pause and keep it at that state. I don't knock anyone who takes suboxone long term...in the end you feel the same...normal.... For me though, I am the master of my own life and that is how I am going to keep it.
Please, if you are questioning anything....before you jump...after you have jumped....or if you are going thru this whole phase of getting better.... Post your thoughts, your questions that you ask yourself; I can't keep up with the e-mails and ALL of you who post on this site are doing a great thing for someone else. You are giving others hope.
Brian SuboxoneTaper.com
Tags: After Suboxone, After Suboxone Withdrawal, Suboxone Facts, Suboxone Taper
Comments (141)
I’m on day 8 off of subs after being on them for about a year . I still get goosebumps a bit and sleeping hasn’t happened much at all yet, but I have had spurts of happiness where I feel like my old self again yesterday and today. Anxiety is still pretty high as well (I think lack of sleep doesn’t help this factor.)
It’s almost like my brain wouldn’t let me be happy for a week and is now showing me what I haven’t felt in the past few years I’ve been abusing opiates. Even posting this comment is a big step for me.
There’s definitely no “Easy Way Out” when quitting any opiate or opioid, but I really do believe I have a good chance because of Suboxone. I’m not gonna say “I dont even think about opiates” because I have had some mouth watering cravings, but I know where that will lead and it’s not what I want, I think I am ready.
-Jeff
***The past few days I have been reading threads (Brian is 100% about the comments and their negative effect on the reader’s psyche), but this story is by far the most relate-able to me and has helped a lot.
I’ve been on subs for two and a half years and have beenn tapering down from 32mg per day to 1 mg every other day. I found that xanax 2mg 3x per day has made this possible. I have a high tollerance for xanax but my doctor says I can taper off of those as well (after I’ve been off suboxone for a few weeks). The biggest problem I have with sub w/d is anxiety. My Dr.’s approach to tapering off subs is to start skipping days since I’m down to 1mg. He says if you try to cut the 2mg subs into quarters it’s impossible to get an accurate dose. my next step is to skip 2 days between doses for 2 wks then three days for one week. After that i’m done. Then I have to continue the xanax untill my sub w/d is gone. I once had six years without any alcohol or drugs by attending 12 step meetings and acctually working steps. This was the happiest and most productive time in my life. As soon as my detox is over (xanax and subs) I will be going back to NA. It has been my expeirience that this is the only way to go. I stopped attending meetings about a year before my relapse. Ithought I was “cured” but this is not possible we can change our way of life and be happy and free but we will always be addicts. I’ve proven this to myself the hard way. Good luck to everyone and deffinately look into NA or AA as soon as you stop ur meds. The support in those meetings is invaluable and we cant do it alone.
My biggest fears;
1. That I will loose all the modivation that has allowed me to co back to school and get in to one of the best colleges in the country (pretty good for someone who did not pass high school).
2. That the rumors will be true and I will be really sick for a long time.
3. That I will use. I don’t have any desire to, but I don’t know how I will feel when I get off.
i havent been takin that much suboxone for the past couple months only like 2 mgs a day. i just dont wanna be sick or go back to doing dope cuz my bf of 6 yrs dies last year from it. and its coming close to that time. i just dont wanna be sick and wanna know if there is other remedies to help me get through this cuz it is affecting my job and my regular life. all i wanna do is sit around. so if u have any ideas please let me know ASAP
I’m so glad I found this site. I need some feedback. I’ve been very close friends with a man for the past year. He has been on suboxone the whole time and he is currently tapering off. We spend every weekend together, talk all the time, he treats me like I am his girlfriend but says that all he wants is friendship. I am in love with him and had a long talk about this with him last weekend. I decided that for my own self-preservation I needed to end the friendship because I wanted so much more than he could ever give me. However, in that conversation he said that he couldn’t imagine never being able to see me or talk to me or have me in his life ever again. He was on the verge of tears when I left. He said that I was the one he wanted to spend his time with and that he didn’t think I should be making this decision now. He said that he’s had absolutely no sex drive and has no desire for any kind of relationship like that with anyone right now and hopes that once he is off the suboxone he can feel better and get on with his life. Since then I’ve been scouring the net looking for information. I guess my question is: could it be possible that he just doesn’t realize his feelings for me due to the numbing effect of the suboxone? Does it really have that drastic of an effect on emotions? Is it possible that once he’s off the suboxone he might realize that it was only the med that was blunting his feelings for me? Clearly I realize that you can’t answer this specific to him, but hypothetically, is what I’m describing to you a plausible situation. I’m just trying to decide whether to hang on until he’s off and see if things change or if I should just deal with the loss now rather than prolong the inevitable.
Thanks
I have been taking 2mg suboxene for over a year. I have been taking two a day. Yesterday and today I have taken one. Any advice or help deeply appreciated.
I have Clinical Depression and boy did the subs work for awhile. But, the depression came back and it is worse.
How does the loved one of an abuser cope? I find myself falling into the traps of the abuser. I find myself being an enabler by giving money to the abuser. I also at times talk down and allow the abuser to play with my emotional side. Allowing him to portray bad behaviors and irresponsibility.
After 12 days, keep in mind that is not including the 3 days after I took my last dose; I started to feel better…but…I was still very shady for about 10 days after that. I started really feeling in the clear at day 25 or so. Remember, from my experience… it’s not that it’s so terrible, you just feel like a blank piece of paper. Suboxone is really for repairing your “lifestyle”. If you have done that. Then just hold on and you’ll be fine after that. I did the whole thing and now…shit…it’s been a couple years.. I’m still clean and I have never given a thought of going down that road again.
Important:!!!! If you have gone this far. You are on the right track. Don’t question yourself. You are stronger than you think if you are even here discussing this. You’re one step away from being OK!
Brian
SuboxoneTaper.com
I really took the suboxone taper SLOW. I tapered from 8mg/daily down to roughly 0.1 mg/daily in a period of 3.5 years. Mind you it is very difficult to measure dose that far down, also I do not believe the dose to be evenly distributed throughout the pill, so sometimes the crumb may contain more or less than the usual dose.
Not to get too far off topic, I jumped exactly 7 days ago and I have started seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. Regardless of being on the substance for so long, I was able to spread my discomfort out over a long and CONTROLLED period of time. I can say with confidence that a majority of my time I feel good. I still experience body aches and apathy, however the intensity and frequency are at a minimum. It makes me very happy to know that I am on the path to freedom from this substance. I hope this can motivate some of you who feel that freedom is unattainable.
Hi I’m new to this site. I started freaking out because I take my last 2mg dose of sub tomorrow. I am so scared. I have read so many terrible things but the one that scares me the most is having post acute withdrawals for a long time and relapsing because of it. Also, I have been on sub for two and a half yrs. Brian, were you good to go after the first 15 days or so? I’m completely panicked…..
Ready To Jump,
I know exactly how you feel. Anxiety is an unfortunate bi-product and trust me… I felt it big time prior to and of course without saying, I felt it big time during my whole suboxone withdrawal…. As I have said though over and over again; take your time, and when you’re ready… you’re just going to have to jump. You’ve come this far, you’re on the right fucking track. Think of it this way, you’re a 5%er (5 percenter)… You’re going to be ok. Sorry to say this, it’ll fucking suck… BUT, you’ve come this far, YOU ARE GOING TO GET THRU THIS AND HANDLE THIS JUST FINE!
Brian
SuboxoneTaper.com
Down to about 1mg per day….been that way for a few months. I know exactly what’s keeping me from jumping…anxiety. It simply overwhelms me sometimes when I’m “on board”, and when I have jumped in the past it is off the charts. So i know what makes me apprehensive to go further…yet i can’t conquer that fear.
Brad,
It’s my site so I can say what I want…. “Fucking awesome article”! I can’t add or comment much more… Thanks for sharing this info and I hope you continue the path you’re on…. Thanks again!
Brian
SuboxoneTaper.com
Great article! Glad to see you have held back the beast!
I abused oxycodone, hydrocodone, oxymorphone, methadone (did I forget one?… yes you can add percs, vicoden, etc) for almost 3 years. I took as much as 250mg/day of oxy/hydro/etc and was as high as 200mg of methadone (not at the same time thank god!). I’m lucky to be alive. Luckily the benzos never stuck… they just made me feel tired… and ritalin, adderal, etc gave me headaches.
It started innocently due to some tendon pain / nerve pain which was driving me nuts. My significant other thought she would be nice and help me out. Unfortunately, it didn’t end there.
During these three years not one person caught on until the end. I had a supply, I tried to act normal, and the pills blocked out my emotional pain due to my wife’s MS, RSD and her own depression. Eventually I couldn’t hold it together anymore. I had to detox for a few days each month to get my “high”. Work was suffering and I was spiraling downward. I was sooooo releaved to be caught. It was over.
I cleaned myself up twice. The first time was for 2 months until I was bit by a dog and needed something to kill the pain… and I was back on the pills. The second time I was off for close to 5 months.
Finally I checked myself into rehab which was a funny story in its own right. The doctors wanted to diagnose me as bipolar because I was happy to be there. Can’t a person be happy to be finally getting help which was desperately needed!?!?! I’ve now been on suboxone for 1.5 years. I started at 8mg/day, went up to 12mg and am now down to 3mg. I’ve been trying to get to 2mg over the last two months but it’s been like a brick wall… and this gets back to the question you ask above. What am I questioning (or what scares me most)…
My Dr. wants to do a slow taper over many months. I’m not sure if this makes the most sense or if I should just jump.
My number one fear, above all else, is the sweating. Will I have to put up with it for months again? Both times I was clean I perspired incessantly. I had to take 2-3 showers a day to keep the smell down and in between change my clothes. It NEVER STOPPED. 5 months later I was leaking like a friggin sieve! It just chugged along making life miserable. I was uncomfortable, didn’t want to be in public or around my family and depressed. I was constantly raining sweat. Whether the dog would have bit me or not, I would have been back on the pills.
My second concern is the anxiety. Luckily, I know from experience it subsides within a few weeks. All I have to do is bear down, meditate and get through it.
As for the rest of withdrawal, I guess I think of it like the flu except I have a little control over when I’m going to get it!!!
But above all else, I want my life back. Suboxone is better than the other pills… I don’t feel high. Unfortunately, I also don’t feel high on life, low on life or much of anything else. Luckily I have mental drive once again and am successful at work. It has allowed my to put my life back together. I remember the times I was clean and how great it was mentally. I cannot wait to get there again. People don’t appreciate the natural high happiness is until they’ve seen the other side… it is better than anything in a bottle can ever provide.
I wish everyone the best! Suboxone is a great tool for those of us who are not mentally prepared or in the position to be done with pills. It has given me time to deal with life’s other twists and approach withdrawal on my own terms.
JKR,
The stuck feeling…lack of funds…and so on. That’s just life in general being masked by what you, we or I have or are going thru. I have been off suboxone for a long while now, fuck, I can’t even remember how long I have been off now (maybe I just don’t want to think about it, it’s been a almost 2 years though).
Your question “Should i just stop I just stop immediatly allowing the w/d to take effect”… Thinking back on things; of course it helps to taper down, but either way, you’re gonna have to face the shitty side of getting off the suboxone one way or another. As I have said in the past; It’s not like coming off of a full opiate agonist….but let me emphasize that since you (and I had been) on that roller coaster ride of “feeling better by popping another pill”…the suboxone, being there all the time and with it’s long acting effects makes you forget what that shitty feeling is like. It’s the benefit of sub… The downside is the “comfort factor” (which it is supposed to be used for) and not feeling that up and and down all the time ie. worrying about your next RX refill, where your gonna get your additional vics, oxys, percs etc from… The down side is the comfort zone, mentally, of not feeling shitty cause you are living life again…. The other downside (if you weigh though the positives to the negatives, and the positives weigh out much better) is…you’re gonna have to take the jump sometime…and it is never an easy landing. It is though much better than slamming into the concrete at full speed.
If you’re ready to get off it, then cool… You’re gonna have to pay up sometime for the choices you (like me have made)… But if you are choosing this position or avenue due to financial reasons; try everything you can to find a way to stay on it till you are ready or just a changed person and suboxone just doesn’t suite you anymore. The thinking of only using it as a stepping stone has, in my opinion changed… It seems to me that suboxone can be a long term maintenance helping hand; that is your call though.
I have wonderered though if jumping at 2mgs (for example) would have made me feel any different versus jumping off at .5mg… I’m just thinking and also in addition wondering myself. I don’t think I answered your question…cause each person is different, and again, that’s your call…. (side note: just so you now; I fucking hate that term “each person is different” cause it’s not an answer…it’s an X factor with no solution…) I hope though that I gave you some kind of insite. (That being, if you’re not ready, don’t rush it. If you are, good luck).
Best of luck
Brian
SuboxoneTaper.com
I’ve been on suboxone since september 2007 after about a year of using various opiates, starting with vicodin and ending on about 3-4 oc 40s a day. i’m now taking about 3 mg a day suboxone.
i have 5 8mg suboxone left, and no current income or funds for my next appt and rx. i’ve been out of work a few months, looking for work, hoping i’d have an income before running out of funds to continue my treatment. but it looks like i’m gonna run out before getting work or recieving any pay, even if i land a job before running out, i’ll just run out before my first check.
i’m vexed about what to do. the suboxone works, physically, but i feel like i’m on a treadmill, stuck going nowhere, and feel i’ll always be dependent on it. so i lack motivation to do anything, since the more i do, the more i depend on suboxone. it’s very depressing. i’m leaning toward the option of taking this time off to go through the w/d rather than re-starting the cycle of having a job, needing suboxone, and working just to afford it and avoid w/d. i feel like i’m frozen in time and will just go on for years, getting nowhere, lacking motivation, lacking freedom, but working to pay for suboxone and avoid withdrawal, which i fear.
any advice would be appreciated, especially regarding how to ration my remaining 5, 8mg suboxone, if indeed i have to face the inevitable and jump off.
should i stop immediately, allowing the w/d to take effect, thereby lowering my needed dose, in order to manage the w/d. or should i continue taking my normal dosage until i flat run out and jump without a parachute?
or do i have enough to do an effective taper?
thanks for your site and advice,
jkr
I have been off for four days now from 8 mgs a day. I feel like shit but I really think I’ll feel better in the next few days. Trust me you don’t need suboxone to be happy it just delays the innevitable. And believe me, I know it always seems like u can’t stop NOW because work school etc but there is always gna be some excuse. If anyone else has stopped taking it it would be wonderful to hear what you are going through
Sebastian,
Thanks for the post. I’ve been on Bupe for just under 2yrs and am about to enter “Day 1″ off of it. I’m at 2-4mg/day, and will take the next week at 1mg/day before starting. I was curious if there were any reasons why NOT to take xanax for the first two weeks if you have access to it, so I’m stoked to hear that it helped you. I’m approaching it the same way you did…
Thanks again, sooooo excited to get past this f’ing monster. Congrats on your 30 days and good luck!
I was recently discharghed from a 3 day detox of having been on 3 60mg oxcycontin and 3-4 30mg oxycodone daily. I was discharged with 10 8 mg suboxone. I was taking 1/2 under the tongue 4x daily the first two days and I cut myself down to 1/2 twice daily for three days until they were gone.
That was 4 days ago. Did I ween myself off too soon? I have some anxiety and perhaps some other symptoms. It has been two weeks since my last dose of opiate and 4 days since my last sub anything. Should I go back to the suboxone for a while?
Sorry, ran off the page, Basically Iam a 52 year old Grandma, I have been on somany sites trying to get some help! I dont want to go back to that lifestyle,ever, ever again. I want to do the right thing! Sorry soooo long” Susie
Hi! Brian, Kinda new to these sites, So forgive me for reading old stuff. But this Blog is good for me! Becauase, I have people saying GET OFF OF IT!!!!! But Bry,For the first time since I was in grade School, I feel normal again! I want to shout it from the roof tops!!! I have been on them for 2 yrs. Which means Ive been SOBERRRRR! And I feel great,But my problem is, is that, the program Iam in,”Says They Are Not A Maintence Program, So then I say, “Can U find me A Meggellen Doctor, That takes Megellen,Cause I have no insurence. Well they say None right now, But U can call around, If I want To.
what is the shortest amount of time you can be on suboxone? I am starting Tuesday…does it have to be a year like i am hearing? Is it possible in a few months to get off it?
Thanks for your time
Ive been on suboxone for over a month now, today i took my first 1.5mg dose after being on 2mgs for 2 weeks and 4mgs for 2 weeks prior to that.. Before suboxone i was on street methadone for 2 years then went to MMT for 3 moths where i tapered from 30mgs-10mgs in 2 months with no w/ds. The only problem i have with completly stoping is my job. I do not have any sick days or vacation left this year as i used it to get high on methadone and my last experiance with stopping methadone cold turky was hellish, didnt sleep for 6 days straight before giving in cuz i had to go back to work. Now that 2010 is a week away ill have 3 weeks of vacatin time and some sick time as well. I can take 15days off max at once and im scared that it wont be enough. I plan on tapering to .5mg before my 15days off work and taking my last dose 3-4 days before my vacation starts. Im 21 and i do mechanical maintenence on a high rise building. I cannot afford going to work after not sleeping for a few days as i could end up hurting myself badly or fucking up big time and getting fired. If i had a month off to myself i wouldnt even think twice about detoxing. Now what can i do to be back at work after those 15-20 days off subs feeelin fine or atleast being able to sleep. If i fail…i cannot even imagine, i mean ill have to wait another few months to try again and if it doesnt work ill be back waiting for 2011 for alotted vacation. I was thinking if i ended up hurting myself at work i could get few months medical leave, i get sick thoughts like smashing my finger with a hammer or just sticking it under a belt driven motor….it could work.
I was on Suboxone for 4 years, I spent the last of said four years slowly tapering from 14mg to 2mg, which is the dose I jumped from…thirty days ago today (23rd Decemer 09).
It took 8-9 days to feel my first sensations of normality and to feel genuine bursts of happiness/endorphins. Even though I was restless, irritable and heavily fatigued I forced myself to exercise. I ran short sprints, and often. Skipping rope, running on treadmill, cycling, stretching and lifting weights in repeated 10 minute sessions helped reboot my endorphin production and after every exercise bout I would flop down exhausted, and laughing because I felt so naturally high! Just like opiates feel. I spent approximately 1.5 hours a day total exercising during the worst of the detox (Days 4-8 especially).
Xanax, Temazepam, Valium and Seroquel got me through the hardest stage and allowed me to sleep every second night. Even whilst doped up on all these 4 drugs at the same time, my insomnia was still bad and normally 4mg of Xanax in one go knocks me out. The insomnia, anxiety and deep unease/restlessness is what makes kicking bupe so hard, and I would’ve found it intolerable were it not for the benzo’s and Seroquel.
One month later and I’ve popped no pills bar my daily Lexapro and occasional Ibuprofen. No benzo’s in the past two weeks and now my mind has a clarity that I do not remember ever having. Sure I sometimes get very restless and often feel profoundly bored but I just get on my bicycle and ride until I feel better.
I have no cravings for opiates or Suboxone and I feel so alive it is amazing. I believe most of the withdrawal is psychological and find it hard to believe Suboxone detox can last longer than two weeks, unless that person is NOT exercising and just laying there agonizing about detoxing. The trick is to occupy yourself and have a friend/family member stay with you throughout the detox who can give symptomatic meds and support.
All the best to you who want to be free of Suboxone, you CAN do it…believe in yourselves and overcome THAT fear.
After doing research i found suboxzonetalkzone a huge lift to my spirit.I think I will send for his tapes on knowing when your ready ,getting prepared and his advise to keep the withdrl to a minimum.I recommend listening to his u tube talks, as Brian posted.Thanks again brian ! I have found that there are some not so scarry stories out there.Since my posts have been so emotionaly different from day to day , Tells me to get more informed and just dont jump off without the rite prep work.The good news is ,I found lots of not so bad stories out there and the one thing they had in common was their slow and commited desire to stick to their tapering, even .5 mg every other day now thats admorable in my book.Either way I will continue to keep soaking up all the advise i can.Maybee I can save all the money I was thinking of spending on the rapid drug detox.Christmas shopping all day wasent so bad. There was a time four years ago when I was taking pills that I could not even get out of the house to shop for my two children,I would give money to my sister to do that stuff so Im not what I want to be but I,M NOT WHO I USED TO BE.Suboxone is not the devil .
just called a place about rapid detox recovery where you get put to sleep and the detox is a lot easier it cost 6700.oo and its in Michigan.ilive in Pa so there would be the cost of getting back and forth.There is financing available also.Am I nuts or just scared cant believe the way I feel TOTALLY freaked out.I am not going to do any tapering till after the holidays,there is just way to much to do,and this is just making it worse right now. Can anyone comment on this ??? Hey Susan Hope you have a good time Skiing.Keep in touch and let me know what you think.
Steve,
Thanks for info.
Today I start 3mg from the 4. I am also picking subutex rx and converting from suboxone as recom. by some. I am waiting to hear Brian’s view. My feeling is less in body better? Chems I mean. Can’t give up coffee and wine but will work on next. My concern is I’m taking my son and friend sking sat. and will need energy for drive and ski. Hope you are well and meetings are good. Thank God it’s Thurs. Got tomorrow off. Sue
Sue, My experience is that there is some pain relief just not the same as opiates.My doctor has me on them for pain.I do take perscription naproxen also. I paint cars all day and my body is sore from work ,life ect…
I am going to be forty five in a few days and i guess , maybe i am feeling my age .It seems harder to taper since ive been thinking about it too much I am ok at 8 one day then four the next,after reading how slowly he did it he must have some good will power because if i feel bad at work ive always taken a half of one. I guess its gong to be time to just feel a little bad and stick with four mg. Some of these people are so good at getting to just one mg and staying on it for a while , where if my back hurts i just want the pain to go away.Sue how much tapering have you been doing to feel the affects of feeling a little crappy at times? Did you E mail Brian ? Was it a help , if thats to personal I understand.Its to the point of just looking at the pill makes me feel guilty and that shouldent be the case I think. Well Sue I thank you for your support and look forward to your messages . I would bet you are a great person. Dont beat yourself up over this we will just take our time and help each other going in the right direction. I am glad to be off the percocets and for that I must remain positive.One last thing everything brian wrote about why he wanted to stop and should he mess with something that aint broken all those reasons are just EXACTLY what goes thru my head.Well its 6:30 here in Pa and going to hit a meeting so gotta go. God I could talk about this stuff for hours . good luck girl!!!!!
steve,
keep going to meetings as there is so much wisdom there. I hope to find a good one to attend myself. Recently I found a chuch service that I plan on sticking with. It’s all good. I am still at 4mg as this week was not good for more taper. I will reduce to 3.5 next dose tomorrow. Hope not too much change. Currently I notice my nose runs, my legs cramp, and the yawns. I also get fatigue. Who knows if it’s life or sub. Anyways do you know how many people complain of pain once sub is gone? Is pain controll something that has been a factor and not even realized. I never realized how strong sub is until now.. sue
just watched the video. the meetings taught me so many things I did not know,I didn,t know. I was really self centered and I thought I was I good person and boy was I wrong.I never thought I was hurting anyone but myself.I had to be shown my character defects and until now never would have listened to anyone.I wouldn,t believe them if they said anything .I was married and thought I was “normal”for 4 years and never did drugs.Anyway it took me to hit bottom to be teachable again, and I would have never listened to anyone else till I identified with the people who have or had gone thru what I am going thru.Was I desperate I guess, no one forced me to go but by the grace of God I found my way to a group of people who could understand everything i was going thru and they really cared and loved my when I just hated myself because of the mess i was in.Does everyone need Meetings I dont know? Do I need meetings YES I do.Its just feels good to no Im not alone and continually need to work on being all I can be.For some reason I cant do that myself.That is why I want to get off this medicine so I can share my fully recovered success story with whoever it may help.This is just what works for me.
Brian did you attend any 12 step programs during your time on subox,and after your recovery?
Brian is it worth it? Thank You for this site . And that first Question was probley an easy one to answer.Is alot of this just in my head or am i fucked and have to pay the piper?Tapering is easy its just stoping and staying stopped thats sounds to scare me .Was never a pussy about anything but this shit. AGAIN THANK YOU !!
Wow Sue your lucky to get to talk to Brian,use that gift . I dont even drink anymore, just dont like loosing a clear head but am going to get some xanax from my doctor for nerves and sleep just hope they dont become a problem too.Brian was lucky to have a good girlfriend to help him thru his tapering, I am not even telling my doctor in case I cant do it. I am just going to do this on my own and my mom is nice ,I started taking meds for knee pain and it got bad and she knew it.Hope staying on this website keeps me going in the right direction I want my old life back more than ever..Good luck talking to Brian. I would love his advise also.!!
Sue, shoot me off an e-mail. info@suboxonetaper.com
Hey steve,
sounds like we are in same boat regarding wanting to get away from the substance. I have not gone to 3 yet as last night I didn’t feel well. I had some wine and knew I probably should not of as it dehydrates and with taper you don’t need that. I’ve been getting leg cramps but not bad. Trying to eat bananas. My goal is to get super healthy and move on by spring. I’m in good shape other than the sub. I’m glad you have a mom that could help you when you need. My mother would freak and than tell the whole world about it. Theres only 2 people I truely trust with this info. MY doc is very weird. He reminds me of a mad scientist. Very very willing to prescribe just about anything but not willing to go out of his way for you any other time. The waiting room is always filled wtith attractive drug dealers/reps. It’s discusting and I know he can’t feel good about what he is doing. I asked him how many have gotten off and he said less than 5%. Well that equates to one and a half people. Talk about scary!!! There will be a law suit in his future I’m sure. Not from me as I will just praise and love God if he helps me get my life back and I know he will. Let me know how you are.
My doctor really is a great guy,he got me involved in church and the meetings I attend .The orange pill that was a life saver has become something that i am not to proud of .I get alot of anxiety just thinking about this issue but its time to man up and make the attempt.My goal is to take time off in the spring and take care of this.I am 44 and will probley get my mom to help me out if it gets to bad.I too am starting a journal as of today, I think it has alot of positive aspects about it.I am grateful for your reply and good luck and God Bless you , hope its not as bad as we think… I am tapering slowly.Let me know how you are doing,if you dont mind.
Thanks steve. I appreciate your response. I am going to drop to 3mg in a couple a days. I hope to be off by end of Jan. I am setting a side about 10 days and stock pileing supplies like gatorade, flu remedies, and alot of friend support for that time. My son will be away so he won’t witness the uglyness I hope. I have read way too much but it’s probably good because I will be prepared for the worst and anything beside chemo sickness will be a plus. I want to put this secret and shame behind me and finally get on with my life because if I do….the best is yet to come. If not I know I will die inside and eventually out. I have had enough!!! I want freedom and a life. A great life without creepy doctors and little orange pills.
Sue, Ive learned alot from going to meetings and being around people in recovery .There are so many great people there, they might make things a little better, the people there are everyday people who just strive for a better way of living and thinking. I wouldnt mind being your friend .Working the twelve steps improve my life everyday,its just up to me to continue. its all about progress not perfection today.But I do reach for the perfection everyday it helps keep my mind were it should be ,not on negative thoughts.
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I don’t go to meetings, I work in healthcare, was not addicted to anything but tramadol and got hurt which lead to looking for easy way which I thought was sub.
was answer but now after 2 plus years. Please help Brian. I need a sponser and a friend.
Brian,
Please be my sponser. I would be eternally grateful if I could get off this stuff. I hate it. I’ve weened from over 32mg to 4 mg a day. Alot on psyco. issues. Please help.
Michelle my doctor says the same thing that i have a disease and 1 pill a day is the way to treat it.I think as we get better we will know with the help of God when it is time to try to stop i dont like the feeling that if i dont have my pill i can get sick . Dont want to live the rest of my life with that “gotta have my pill” feeling.But i,ve never abused it or ran out in my three years so am I worried over nothing?WE need a Suboxone Annonomous group because i live AA but sometimes I want to talk about suboxone with other people.
A little about my story. I was a opiate addict that along with methemphedamine, I like to go fast I was never a needle junkey I just liked energy. This year in april i noticed to myself that I really had a problem, jobs money, credit score nasty 500′s 4 years ago was almost 800. So i descided to get into a methadone clinic, wow wasn’t for me driving 30 miles each way every day then payn 11.00 a day blah blah, I was on 23 mg’s on methadone I go tired of being profiled, the cops were bad in that town always holding a road block twice a week and harrasing ppl in the mmt program. So i descided to quit, I knew one time I missed my carry homes and the whole wknd I was sick, real bad. Anyways after I quit the mmt i thought it would be hard but not to bad, was I wrong after about 3 days again I called a suboxone doctor got in there I have been on 16 mg’s for about 5 weeks, I went down to 8 mg’s bymyself without him knowing for about a lil over a week I can’t tell a difference in about another week I’m gonna try 4mg’s It’s not expensive for me I can’t afford it me just being on unemployment and I wanna be normal again. Do you think It will be bad going to 4 mg’s anyone? I got strong will power and just want to be normal without and medication.
Hello Scared,
I was also on 32 mgs of subs because I have long (20 yr.) history of methadone use and (25 yr.) heroin use. I may be wrong, but I don’t think most sub patients need such a high dose. I did because of all the yrs. on heavy opiates. I am now on 8 mgs and feel great. Keeping in mind that even on 32 mgs I felt like crap for first 2 weeks on subs. My doc started me at 16 but I was still so sick for first week so he upped dose to 32. He tappered me 1 mg every two weeks. Getting ready to go down to 7 mgs tomorow. I just hope that the .25 mgs to 0 will not be as bad as tappering off methadone. I tappered off meth from 80 mg to 0 over course of a year and I had real bad withdrawals for 2 weeks followed by moderate w/d for over a month! God help me, I am so tired of this crap. Just wanna be clean. My use has been on and off for 25 yrs. (not steady). Longest clean time was 8 yrs. I’m shooting to stay clean for the rest of my life this time. Grateful to my family for putting up with me for all these yrs.!!! Good luck to you and everyone posting on this board.
I was wandering about what something my doctor said.
I took pills for a couple of years after meeting someone new and joining the crowd instead of leading. Then after realizing it was out of control started subox 4mg. Now, like all, i just want a normal life back. My doctor said I have a disease. “Its ok if one pill a day will fix it”. I wasnt on anything for some 15 years before, except the occasional drinking on weekends. Is the doctor right or is he just trying to make money. If it is a disease is tapering ok, ????????
THANK U… THANK U… Im on week 1 off suboxone and have been freaking out. I feel like im losing it! Def. not gonna touch pills again but the way i feel is ummm out of control. I needed to hear that it gets better and a time frame. A kind of goal to reach. I needed to hear that this HELL PHASE WILL END!! and soon :) Longest week of my life.
Hey scared, can I get your Doctors name and the State he or she is in so I can beat him/her withen inches of he/she life?(just kidding of course) 32mg huh? That Doctor doesn’t have a clue on what they are doing. I can’t believe your insurance pays for that. You must be paying cash. Drop down to 16mg at once and you will feel no withdrawl at all. Go to the site that this site recommends suboxonetalkzone.com and go to the search part and type in ceiling effect and read what the Doctor there has to say.
Great site Brian.
Wow I wish I would have found this site earlier. I’m currently taking 32mg/day and desperately wanting to taper. I’ve been looking around the internet for the past few days trying to find someone advice on their taper schedule, obviously I need to accomodate what would be comfortable for me, yet I have never heard of anyone even on such a high dosage as myself. Naturally I am really scared but beyond ready to do this. Not only is it a financial issue but I feel like I was a slave to the opiates now the suboxone and just want off the rollercoaster. I’ve been taking suboxone for 2 years now. I have had a few occasions where I ran completely out of sub due to insurance confusion, and the withdrawl was intense. Jumping off from 32 mg/day to nothing. Painful days where its hard to function while in withdrawl..as Im sure all of you know. Im really happy I found this site. As “Wise” has said, I feel much more confident having found this support. Im really looking forward to tapering. Any thoughts on a potential schedule would be greatly appreciated.
Wise,
Thanks for the comments and it sounds like you are doing well. Just a reminder or some advice from how I went about it. The longest part of the suboxone taper for me was basically from 3mg a day to 1 then less. I really took my time in this area. Another suggestion, which I did and I don’t suggest; try to stay on the level…or what I mean is…when you drop a certain amount….then stick to that amount ie. 3mg to 2.50mg… What I did was get down to let’s say 2mg from 3mg then on day 3-4 after my change…. I might have felt just a little off so I would break off a chip. The thing with doing this is that it just throws you into this wacky chemical imbalance. It’s not bad at all, but it just kind of makes you take this little roller coaster ride. Lastly, and you know, I have always said this. Just take your time. There is NO rush.
You can find a shit load of articles out there now, including from SAMHSA that are reporting from the AMA and DEA…. “Suboxone is and can be prescribed for recovery and now for long term or on a permanent basis”. Not telling anyone to stay on it…and I’m not telling anyone to get off it. Either way I look at it, if you’re on suboxone, or plan on staying on suboxone and you have changed your life, you’re not abusing the opiates anymore, you’ve just opted to stop living that lifestyle with medicaly prescribed help. Suboxone changed my life, I took the ride and opted to get off because of popular opinion at the time. I’m glad I was able to get off suboxone and stay off. Been a year now that I have been off it (was on it for almost 3 years) and I just don’t have it in me anymore for that lifestyle and I have yet to be tempted by anything.
Thanks for the comment on the site also…. I know I am missing some pictures..etc.. I put the new site frame-work together in 35min and had other sites to work on; kind of cut corners. I’ll get it all dialed in so it looks better or easier on the eyes. Wise,…keep in touch.
Brian
Suboxone Taper
I visit your site periodically, at least once a week, and I love the new look to it! You are a huge inspiration to me and to some friends of mine that are still struggling. I’m still tapering myself, and after finding your site, I feel more confident than. Life is so much better on suboxone. I’m having a little trouble tapering from 3 to 1 mg, but i know I can do it, especially after reading about your experience. I will have been on it two years in Oct. Thanks Bryan for the great site! And you are helping people more than you think!!!
Glad to hear that it took 3-4 months, ’cause this is almost 7 weeks , and I still have some intermittant physical withdrawal symptoms (dilated pupils, GI problems, chills, general not feeling well).